Starting from square one, and listening to Taylor swift songs on the bathroom floor, I realized that I never stop growing. I never stop expanding. And I never stop doing. And as I grow, as I expand so does my writing. Everything that I write develops into this phenomenal spin and kaleidoscope of reality and hopes. And I have faith that it will find it's voice, that I will find my voice, and it will change something or someone standing still.
I am a Taurus. And contrary to widespread and popular beliefs I welcome change. I don't like it too much at once. I don't like the negative (but who does)? But altogether I do welcome it. Because change is adventure. Change is a new chapter. Change is possibilities.
Once upon a time I wanted everything to stay the same. I even sang about it. But then how does one grow? Growth isn't always suppose to feel good. And like a child does with their own growing pains, we will whine at times, maybe shed a few tears surrounded with complaints. But in order to flourish and flower and reveal my true self then I will accept that.
So, no. I don't write about the things that I did when I was fourteen and fifteen. Words intertwined with the memory of puppy love and a blue eyed boy. I don't write about the same things that I did when I was twenty. Songs of brown eyes now and an acceptance I have never quite found. I don't even write the same words down that I may have had just a few months ago because I'm not that same person. I'm not even the same person I was yesterday. Because even though everyone wants to tell you to grow up or that we will all understand some day, we never will. Because I am convinced we will never stop growing. Not until we're in the ground and fade into a quiet memory. And we will never understand what is impossible to the human mind because NOT understanding just may be the journey in life. And if we have it all figured out, if we have no more questions to ask, maybe that would be the saddest part of all. The very real end of a journey that no one else could take but us.
Along with the changes in my writing. Along with the changes in my soul. I am also okay with the uncertain, ,with the inevitable, and with the questions that we carry with us always. And that is enough.
~Barefoot. Woven. Human~
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